Thank you all for the wisdom--having a night to sleep on things made a difference, too. At age 35, he is the youngest of 4. His other siblings are 8-15 years older than him. Their. Alcoholic father died a few years ago of cancer. Parents are in their 70's. Very dysfunctional home with alcoholic sister in and out frequently--they all live very close by. Not so sure that his mom and sister will keep alcohol out of the home. I think it's more like, "so don't drink it." He works as a general contractor in the building industry, thus the majority of his $ situation is not a direct link to his drinking but consequences of the last couple years' economy. He is a professional, functioning alcoholic. Living with me is not an option. I live with my parents currently. One of the things that has helped me to stay more detached is that we live 25 minutes apart, so it's not really easy to see each other. I work in retail, so my work schedule changes week to week, and I have a super sweet 10 year old daughter who is my #1 priority. Plus I wouldn't offer anyway. I know better! We dated 4 years ago, briefly, as I learned rather quickly of his alcoholism. I tried rather to get him to turn things around and supported him as a friend through e-mail. I gave up after about 1.5 yrs. I figured he was in God's hands. Then six months ago we got back in touch. I was feeling him out and he bit the line. We met up and I saw that he was still drinking heavily. I knew that I shouldn't/couldn't have a relationship with him if he's still drinking, so I eventually contacted an interventionist for guidance. He told me to reach out to his family. So I contacted the most sane sister, who lives out of state, and she happened to be coming to town that weekend. She was very on-board, and wanted me to meet up with her and their mom to get their mom on-board. We met that weekend, and she agreed to put him in rehab. They told him it was rehab or the door--he chose rehab. I guess the hard part is not rationallizing the "he needs help with..." and saying, "any normal person can do that for themselves." Hope the additional info gives a better picture. Thanks.