Originally Posted by
Gypsy Feet 
I was an excellent mother, went to every soccer game, choir performance, and swim meet. I was an excellent wife, 3 course meal on the table every night, never cheated and did all the nice things he liked. I was an excellent daughter, married a nice guy, got my college degree and anything my mother asked I obliged.
And now I know, my mother had a drunk for a daughter, my husband had a drunk for a wife, and my daughter was raised in an alcoholic home. 28 years straight I drank, paused only for pregnancy.
We did the best we could with what we knew then. I know better now.
Arrogance was/is a big problem for me. I always think I know what is best. In recovery, here on SR and in the rooms of AA, I am constantly amazed at how little I really know, and overwhelmed by the power of the truth.
Go to people who have done this deal and be teachable. Listen to people who have years of sobriety, they have secrets to teach us. If you want it bad enough, there is an amazing life to be had in recovery. Welcome back
You and I have a lot in common! I too was an excellent wife and mother in my eyes. I too held off drinking during my pregnancies, but I was so excited to have my first drink after I delivered my son that I snuck a bottle of wine into my hospital room! My babies were always well cared for - bathed, fed, changed regularly. I took them for long walks in the stroller and had playtime with them daily. As my son got older I taught him things like colors, numbers, letters. My house was always clean. I always went to work. There was nothing wrong with me, my life was running smoothly...DAMN if I didn't deserve to indulge in something I truly loved.
The problem was, I wasn't being honest with myself, I was in the grip of addiction, and no matter how much I tried to defend it, I WASN'T the being the best mother and wife I was capable of being.
I have an abundance of free will and have had to learn a lot of humility in my recovery process. It wasn't until I got myself to a doctor for detox medication, sat in the rooms of AA, found a Higher Power and finally SHUT UP AND LISTENED for once in my life that I could truly learn.