I only stopped when I wanted to.. nothing else could have brought me to the point to where I wanted sobriety before I truly did.
Please post your story in the Friends and Family of Substance Abusers, they have tons of experience with this stuff, and they are a great support to one another.. and can offer guidance for you. You're going to hear a lot about enabling, not providing a 'soft place to land', and establishing boundaries, taking care of yourself.. all of which are important things to do.
I'm sorry that you're going through this, and I hope you find a way to just take care of you.. at least for today.