Daphne,
AA turned me off for the same reasons. (I'm not here to promote AA, by the way. Alcohol abuse is just awful and whatever works for the individual is the right method or program, IMO.)
My attempts to stop drinking: I saw several psychologists, and read and read and read, and came at it from the self-improvement, life coaching angle, and none of it clicked with me. Those methods do click with other people, and I thought they would click with me. I think of myself as a logical, non-spiritual person. I was raised as a Roman Catholic, and I've tried to warm up to JC all my life, and: nothing. I don't believe in the 'disease theory' of alcoholism either.
I went to AA out of desperation and because there was nothing left for me to try besides an inpatient program, and that was my last resort. And, so far, it's working (in combination with SR of course!). I don't know how really, but it is. I still am not into JC, btw, it really doesn't come up much.
As for a reason to to try AA, mine was time. Time was passing by. I'd blink and a year was gone, then two, then five, then 10. It wasn't so much a fear of death, as much as a fear of a life lived muffled underwater. I had to try new methods for quitting, because I couldn't let time keep on ticking with me drinking. Drinking hasn't completely destroyed my life, but it has progressively cut me off from a lot of good things in life.
I ramble a bit, but my main point is: try different methods for quitting. Find what works for you. And if you stop for a month or two and realize that you don't have any issues with alcohol, well, then you're free to drink. That is your decision.
Welcome to SR. This is a great place to be
