welcome to S.R. this is not a good way to start the year off, for this i am sorry. i am glad u have found us.
first off, this is not your fault. there is nothing u can say or do to keep your husband clean. he will find an excuse not to get any counciling untill he is ready. he will not like any of them. it will always be an excuse not to go to a rehab. i am scared for you because he puts his hands on you. you worry about him killing himself. he can kill you that easy. i can not tell you what to do but you can not fix him. have u ever been to naronon? there is alot of support there. meeting are always good. they are free. he will not get any better until he hits his bottom. do not keep it a secret what he is doing.people should know. you need to be safe. do not be scared to call the law. keep coming here. we care & there is alot to learn. hugs & prayers, hope