Is your friend doing greysheet? if so, yup, an apple can be a binge. But if she is...she should be calling her sponsor with that, NOT you.
I'm new to recovery and have some of the same questions you do. I have to be REAL careful about my own recovery and boundaries. If I am having a good day, I may be tempted to make promises I can't keep, ie...reaching out more than I am capable of committing to.
At this point I am keeping it simple, and not making committments, because if I do, I will go home, stress myself to death and get in a pickle. I can talk to people after meetings, but I am not prepared to be "called at any time"...so I won't make that offer to someone.
I had one make that offer to me..then pretend it wasn't her when she picked up the phone...hmmm. I understand where she is coming from and don't hold it against her, but I think I'd rather NOT go there and end up having to be dishonest or whatever.
My own sponsor admitted that there is one area that is a huge trigger for her and if I have a specific problem in that area could I please call someone else. She told me this right off the bat, didn't wait till I was in crisis or anything, and I appreciate her honesty. It's good for both of us.
I have not yet joined a home group (waiting on a job to see if I will be free to attend any of their meetings due to time conflicts) but I try to help out in little ways at the meetings I attend, chairs, literature (no one is assigned those as specific jobs) even helping with coffee, etc. I am moving toward giving other addicts rides, and I do make an effort to speak with people who are even newer than me, and to speak up about my experience as a newcomer when there are newcomers at meeting. Those are acts of service I can do, that currently do not trigger me.
I trust, and others assure me, that as I work the steps I will become equipped and confident to do more and get more involved. But working the steps, not just showing up at meetings is essential...they tell me. I may stay clean, but I won't grow and recover until I do my stepwork.
I am also careful about who I "befriend"...We are a bunch of addicts and some of us have some pretty serious issues in the area of relationships...A newcomer may be the most important person at any given meeting but face it...I am in NA for ME. MY recovery is MY priority. I wouldn't have strolled in those doors a non addict just out of the goodness of my heart to help someone else.
I came in to recover, I stay to recover, and if something in the program, after honest evaluation is hindering my recovery, I will stay away from it, or them. This can be due to MY issues as much as theirs. I recognize they may be fine, but because of where I am, I need to stay away.
This has already happened, there is a man I am very attracted to, but I really need to not go there...so I keep my distance, no hugs, no idle chit chat, no standing next to him in closing circle, etc. He is a great guy, works his program, doesn't lech after women...in this case I am the issue!