I really REALLY don't like not having the thank you button; it was one of my closest friends here on SR. Sooooooooooooo, teke, you've received some great responses here; not much more for me to add except......U GO GIRL!!!!
I was going to do the next in PM's as they're a tad off-topic, but what the hey; I'm here now, and I'll try to make it short............:
teke, you said a bit ago, "...i promised myself that i would write no more letters or send no more of the little money that i did have, to him. i promised myself that i would not be his comfortor or his connection to the outside world. (boundary that i didn't realize i had set for myself but gonna stick to). that maybe why i just don't care to write any kind of letter especially since he asked me to..."
---- I feel this is a very good thing for you, at least for now. Right now you're a bit raw, and there's no sense in adding to drama with misunderstood writings ('interpreted' or 'misinterpreted' writings...etc...on his end; not yours---many alcoholics/addicts love to interpret what other folks 'mean' instead of just taking the words themselves for what they mean). There may come a time when you'll be able to (write and do what's needed for the kids); like Impurrfect wrote about her experience, but I got the impression that it took a while.....eh.....?
.....and lastly (and absolutely off-topic)......:
Impurrfect, when you wrote, concerning your 'no contact' time and about when you did write.....: "...The only contact I DID have with him is when I'd find out he was in jail, I would write. I mostly talked about his mama (she died 2 years ago and I adored her) and about how well I was doing in recovery...hoping it would spark something in him....it didn't work..." ---- I'm sorry, but I must disagree here.....it certainly did work; you're still around, and clean.....(yes, I know that isn't really what you meant, but I just wanted to end on, at least a semi, up note.....)........ (o:
NoelleR