Sending a Hug!!!!
God bless you. I know where you're at right now, because I have been there and I am still there. It's is painful when you love someone who is so sick that they become emotional unavailable and full of love for theirself. That's what alcohol does....like the big blue book says its "cunning, baffling and powerful." My husband is an A. He has invested around 25 years into his career of alcoholism and I have invested 19 years into our marriage. My husband moved out on May 25th under protest since he was "escorted" out by the local police. He was drunk again and I reached my bottom. I was locked with my daughter in her bedroom when I heard him open his gun cabinet, sound as if he loaded and cocked a pistol and then said "I'll show you bitch!" I called the police and I waited quietly in the room for them to come take him away. On his bond order he was told to no family contact, no alcohol, no weapons. On yesterday he called me at work. I reported him. He was called in to the station. He arrived drunk. His dad drove him there. So he violated two of the orders on the bond. He can't blame me for this one. He lost his job because he was locked up in jail. He blames me. He's very sick. In order for him to get well, I must detach and allow him to feel the "pain" of his disease. One of two things will happen. Either he will hit bottom and start climbing up or he will die. I accept either. I am no longer in denial. I have surrendered this all to God because I finally realize my life, as it is now, is unmanageable. AA/Alanon meetings and a good therapist have helped me. Alcoholism is a progressive disease. If it does not go into remission it will only get worse.
2nd Best****email me sometime if you just want to "talk." I'll listen and I'm sure I'll also "learn" a lot as well!
God bless!
If my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and turn from their wicked ways I will hear their cry and heal their land! II Chronicles 7:14