I like the analogy. I think of it the same way sometimes. I started thinking that this voice in my head that keeps telling me I can control my drinking or that I'm not really an alcoholic.... that this voice is not really me... it's my disease... it's this alcoholic entity that wants me to fail.... It lies... It's manipulative... and it's smart! Ever since I started thinking that, it's been easier to identify lies it tells me and easier to defeat it.
I don't like to think I'm powerless... I am strong. I am powerful. I am smart. I can do anything I set my mind to... unless I drink. One drink and I become powerless. As long as I don't give in, I am winning and I'm proud of that. I am grateful for that.
I've been attracted to alot of the methods of SMART recovery to help me change my thinking. There are parts of the 12 steps that I also utilize. I also try to make myself strong by eating healthy and by focusing on goals like running a marathon... basically, things I could never achieve as an alcoholic.
I think everyone has to find what works for them. I have no where near the amount of experience in sobriety as some of these other people. But I have changed my life for the better these last 3 years, cutting out bad habits like smoking and drinking every night. Cutting out drinking ALL TOGETHER is my new effort. I'm inspired by the people in this forum... people like you. Keep up the good work! You can beat it!