Do you live near your niece?
Can you start checking out AlAnon meetings together?
Another daughter of an A got me to go to my first AlAnon meeting...it was a huge help and really it has made all the difference for me in turning my own life around!
My sister complains to me about how sad she is that she wasn't a better mother and how upsetting it is to her, but yet she is still being a bad mother (ie..having daughter pick her up drunk, making nasty phone calls)
*sigh* Sounds like an alcoholic doing what alcoholics do. Once I truly accepted that my brothers would continue to do the stupidest things when drinking and make the poorest choices imaginable I stopped being surprised or angered. But I struggle with acceptance -- it sometimes takes me a while to believe what I am seeing!!
peace-
b