Boyfriend may be using oxy's or heroin...
Hello, I am a member of SR and have been sober a year and 5 months off alcohol and any substance. Alcohol is my drug of choice and never got into harder stuff but family and friends have.
I have been dating a guy for 6 months who is sober in the program has a sponsor goes to meetings works the steps however last week his behavior changed.
The first thing I noticed were his eyes were pinned I dismissed this as I know he is doing all the suggestions of AA. Then he went into these cleaning spurts cleaning my entire car after a meeting instead of fellowshipping. We all went out after the meeting (all sober people) and he was off doing his own thing which I didnt think much of.
Thanksgiving he was acting weird again, distant, small pupils blinking. Trips to his car and bathroom. I started thinking this is all in my head.
Friday we went out to dinner and he was in the bathroom for like 10 minutes. He came out was quiet distant and said there was a line. While he was in the bathroom I said to my brothers girlfriend I hope he is ok. And she replied "a couple of days ago your brother said he looked high". I went into fear and lost my appetite. My brother is a recovering heroin addict.
So I watched his behavior he immediately went to have a cigarette followed by a trip to the bathroom to wash his face as he was too hot. Then he took his long sleeve shirts off and was in a wife beater (tank top) in cold weather (the restaurant is hot). I also saw tylenol pm in his pocket which he took before bed and exhibited other weird behaviors.
I went to my best friend in the program for advice and she told me she thought he was high twice but did not want to say anything. I was shocked. She is a recovering addict with almost as much time as me. So I am a mess. My best friend called him out of concern one addict to another and his response was how can you think that.
He immediately called me after saying he was going to get a drug test to prove he was not high. Thought this was weird. I know I have not drank and if you asked me I would say no end of story. But he was really hurt and looking for sympathy. Said he was not using but I know it is a catch 22 because if he was he would lie as he knows I would leave him. I have a lot of circumstancial proof but nothing that gives me grounds to break up with him.
So please help with suggestions on how to approach this. I talked to my sponsor and she said all I know is he took tylenol pm to sleep. That is the only fact.