Oh, honor....I am SO sorry you had to endure that abuse. NO HUMAN deserves to be treated that way. You might do well to also see about getting some (hopefully free) counseling with a women's center if there's one near you. The abuse is going to get worse before it gets better and you should think about getting some professional support. You poor dear. I just wish I could give you a hug
My XAH was almost as bad, and although it was a long time ago I still remember the stabbing feeling in my chest from the hurtful words.
If it was a sign you were looking for, you sure got it. What's next? Can you stay somewhere else?