I can totally relate. My mother is a functioning alcoholic as well. Yes she can hold a job and seem quite normal to most people. I'm a grown woman 34 and married now but I'm lacking something in my life. I have learned that nobody can change her. Only she can change and she will NEVER change so I've just learned to limit my time with her. She hardly ever calls anyway. I actually feel like I don't have a mother at all. She's just not that into hanging out or interested in my life. I've only gotten upset and angry and she has been nothing but a total let-down for me my whole life. I could go on and on about some of the BS she has done or not done over the years: DUI'S, drunkin' behavior around my friends, drunk dialing, lying, destroying my room and belongings, verbal abuse and on and on. Yes she had gone through some bad things in her younger years and I get that but she really needed to work those things out. She chose the bottle instead. I've just learned that it will always be the same outcome with her. I see her for holidays and maybe we'll do a girls weekend in the summer with my younger sister but that's about it. I do feel an emptiness inside. I wish I had another mom. Someone who gave a damn. She wasn't even interested in helping me plan my wedding
I planned the whole thing by myself. She spent most of the time up stairs tending to my brothers baby the day of our wedding. My husband wanted a traditional wedding and his mother wouldn't travel to Anguilla. That's another story in itself. His mother is a hypochondriac. No joke! She's been a sickly person her whole life. So I have no support there. It's all about her. Every week she has something new. Needless to say I was stuck in a rut and a hard place for the wedding. I didn't enjoy any of it. See why I wanted to elope in Anguilla? As far as my dad, he's been around but never a father figure. Can't hold a job never been there econmically for me etc. Not a drinker though but has his own issues as well. Deadbeat dad I guess you can say. They divorced when I was 5.
I guess I'm here because throughout my life I have found it very difficult to have female friends for one reason or another. Some betrayal (on their part) or some because I just don't have the patience to hang out for too long when a problem arises in a friendship. I would actually love to have girlfriends but I have a hard time warming up to women or vise versa. Any suggestions? Is there a group or place for people like me?