Give Love have I told you lately that I love you?
Now, about that conference. Tell me how great that's going to be
This will be my second DPA conference. They're held bi-annually and every human who can give me a job in drug reform will be there. I ran a successfull oped project for one of the sponsoring organizations but they moved me to Staff Writer because we only have an operating budget for about 3 more months only so I'm helping with development. We;re a non profit so the economy is eating us alive.
Anyway-I only work part time for these guys and REALLY need full time work so I"m hoping someone there will give me more work.
I also telecommute and will be meeting many of my colleges in person for the first time.
Last conference, I had two men that were very forward with me and bought me dinner and paid a great deal of attention to me: the man who won the lifetime achievement award, and a DA from the east coast. At the time it was so bizarre to me and I'm not expecting it to happen again but looking back on it I think those men saw and treated me so differently than my AH ever did, I wasn't able to fully comprehend the message there. That I am beautiful, smart and capable. I remember thinking at the time, now here's a man I could really be happy with.
But I went home to AH and kept up the fighting, the pain, kept running after him. Like a child.
This time, I feel sort of beaten. I am desperate for a job. I have been to hell and back in these last two years. I'm not looking for external validation from men (and wasn't two years ago either, that's what took me so by surprise) but I know I'll meet many wonderful, dedicated, inspirational people and that this time will propell me forward in my work for a good long time.
And, I get to room with this amazing, 60 year old woman who is still spanking hot, brilliant and wise. I love her.