hi Jason -
The meeting's only a couple of blocks from your house?
wow.
What you're doing right now -
the vascillating on whether to go to a meeitng-
I doubt anyone on this website
hasn't done exactly the same thing.
Maybe take a moment
and go back and read
that first post on this thread.
That's how real the problem is.
It's not going to go away.
That much I can promise you.
It's not going to get better.
Because if you could have made it better -
you would have long before you had to make that first post on this thread.
We all did it.l
We all thought AA was the absolute WORST thing that could happen to us.
And the only thing that aa is absolutely HORRIBLE for -
is it makes it near impossible to continue drinking *and* denying there's a problem.
Damn hard to keep pretending it's not a problem.
In reading your posts, I can see you trying to convince yourself
you can do this on your own,
or even that there's really not a problem warranting outside help.
We ALL did that.
We ALL sat and stared at the receiver before hitting the 'send' button.
We ALL were terrified to admit
on a real and honest level
just how addicted we really were.
That's why the alcoholics in AA
are waiting ... with our hands held out to help.
Because we ALL know.
From the inside out.
My very best wishes,
Barb