You are magnificent! Has anyone told you that lately...well tig honey, they should be writing that on the side of buses for the world to read at rush hour.
You received a text from someone in the next room to say that he's leaving. Could that be any more passive aggressive???! But you my dear actually have the grace and style to not walk into the room he's in and smack the stupid right off him! I would have had to tack myself to the floor to keep from doing it.
You then had the wherewithall to play that mental tape all the way through and answer your own question of why without believing a word of what he would have said. The words can change, but the theme is always the same..deflect blame and take no responsiblity for your alcoholic actions.
Oh, and then you brilliantly laid out a healthy and loving plan to put your recovery first and to mend a life that has become broken over time living with an addict spouse.
I am inspired by your post and I truly do find you...m*a*g*n*i*f*i*c*e*n*t !!
All grief wants is to be acknowledged. Do so, and it will pass.
Alice