christin1225

Jason, I'm a wife and I assure you that I would want my husband to tell me. I would want to support him. That being said, I'm an addict who spent her first several months in recovery without her husband/family knowing. I know what you're feeling. My family didn't know that I used drugs. Why would I want to hurt them and drag them into my mess when I'm trying to make it better?

So, I snuck around to recovery meetings, which meant that I had to lie on a somewhat regular basis. Regardless of whether I was having a good day or a horribly difficult and frustrating day, I had to plaster on the "I'm okay" face. When it got really hard, I had to cry without making a sound. Of course, going to meetings on the sly was better than doing nothing at all. However, it wasn't until I told my husband and my kids, that the shame began to diminish. When I finally told them, it was terribly painful to do. But, it was the best thing that I've done. I finally began to experience the hope of recovery.

I don't expect that you'll read this and immediately decide to tell your wife. It took five months for me to muster the courage. When I did, I sobbed. It broke my heart to tell them about my addiction and about the things that I had done. But, my family was grateful that I told them. In fact, my husband's reaction was one of disappointment in himself. After I told him, he apologized to me because he felt that he should have recognized something. It saddened him to know that I had been struggling alone for five months. Why would I have tried to do it alone when I knew that I had him and he loved me?

Does my husband worry about my disease? Yes, at times, he does. But, that's the way that he wants it and, if the situation were reversed, I know that's the way that I would want it too. My husband is a main part of my sober support. I think that's the way that marriages are meant to be. I suspect that if you asked your wife she just might agree.

:praying