Old 10-12-2009, 04:34 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
trapeze
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 234
I am new to this forum, but not the issue of alcoholic parents. I was raised by alcoholics. My dad is now deceased, my mom is 77 and still drinking.

Years ago I sought therapy regarding how to deal with my parents, and my shrink's advice was a question: can you stay away?

I confronted the issue of their drinking when I was around your age, and I'm 51 now. Guess what - she hasn't changed, at least not for the better. As she has aged (and the disease progressed), she became less and less interested in her children and grandchildren. I did draw the line about my parents driving my child.

It sounds a bit flippant, but the reality is there's nothing you can do about your mother's drinking. Do you get anything out of your relationship with her? Does she make you feel good about yourself like a mother should? Does she treat you the way you will treat your kids?

My mother is in my life, but I have given up on the notion of a real mother-daughter relationship with her. Fortunately, I have a wonderful 29 year old daughter with whom I am very close. As she grew up I realized that I had learned nothing from my mother about parenting, other than what not to do.

I've read about interventions, but I don't know anything about them myself.

Good luck.
trapeze is offline