Originally Posted by Puggrinz

All he could say is that "something is missing from this marriage, and that he used to love me and that he tried all he could but that he couldn't do it anymore."

Could it be him?


So he left. I never heard another word from him until tonight. He called the house on sunday and my cell phone but didn't leave a message, I was at church. So today, four days later I am beginning to get worried, and I wonder if he is in jail?? or what?

And what if he was? Not a darn thing you can do about it, is there?

So I break down and call his cell phone with the excuse of finding out where the delinquent house payment is and he answers and .....

I asked him why didn't he even have the courtesy to call me and let me know? What if I had been in a wreck or our daughter had or some othersdisaster had happened--and he had no answer just started the same ol rote, how he didn't love me anymore, something was missing, blah blah blah.

And what if, God forbid, some disaster had happened, on the home front. What's he going to do about, what's done?

His heroin mistress demands loyalty. There is no room for him to love himself , let alone anyone else.

It is, as they say, not personal. It is addiction.

And of course that hit my buttons, because I was already feeling weak because I didn't even matter to him for him to call. He just snuck out of town. And here I was so desperate to engage him, that I just kept doing all the stuff I have learned not to do.

Now I have to put up with all his crap of everything I said on the phone getting thrown back in my face.

You can put up with it, or not. It's your choice.

Talk about one step forward and thirty steps back. What a complete moron I am. I can't stand myself.