Kez

Hi Saphie,, i sooo identify, i couldnt figure out why i couldnt get started (well it wasnt my second time, it was probably my hundreth time) I to had sober months and loved be clear minded and feeling great when i woke up,, i dont understand why its so hard to stay there... but it is... and the longer we have the alcohol problem for i think the harder it gets for us to stop... i always new the disease was progressive but it hit me more when i came to this site by listening to everyone.. now i realized that the brink that i was on, was the next declining level in the sickness and i could tell it was about to get a whole lot worse, but thankfully to these good people, i was able to snap myself out of that decline and now i am 5 days sober and I pray that i stay this way.........

good luck to you......