I think the first thing you need to do is find that self love inside you. You have to love yourself and believe in yourself if you are to succeed in anything.
Dont focus on the past, the negative, what you cant fix.
Start clean. Literally.
Nothing that has happened matters. It may cause some issues in the future. But you take it as it comes and always remember that that was then and this is now. Just stay the course and do the right thing and things will fall into place.
And always keep trying. I cant stress that enough. I dont care if you fall a million times. You get up a million and one.
Welcome back.