The past couple of weeks have been quite harrowing. My father called 911 Thursday before last and had himself admitted to the hospital. His blood alchohol level was 125.00 this time. He was severely dehydrated and sodium was drastically low. They kept him 24 hours. He went home, and caused a big stink in the family because of the things he said and did that night. Fortunately or unfortunately, I lost it completely. Panic attack, angry attack and all. Not very pleased with myself, but not alot I can do to change yesterday, huh? Well, long story short, I began to finally care about me for a change. I "had" to see the Doctor as I had a running panic attack from Friday until Monday. Doctor wasn't real pleased with me either. But, a very big help. He gave me Paxil. I'm hoping that the nausea goes away so that I can continue as it is really helping my disposition. As to my Dad, he decided finally that he did not want to be alone anymore and went to one of our local retirement villages, signed up, and may move in after Wednesday. I refused to help with anything. Said "if this is what you really want...go for it!" He seems real pleased with himself. But, the fact is that I'm real pleased with myself. I have never been able to let go like that before. It feels good for a change. Listening in on all the conversations here has really helped. You are all a blessing to me. Please know that I am saying a prayer for all of my internet al-anon friends everyday! God be with you all.
LOLLY
