What a lovely story. Some would argue that believing a person becomes alcoholic is to help others know compassion and love and the alcoholic is living up to their true potential, is a bit of rationalizing by friends/loved ones.
Recovering alc's will usually recount stories about "living hell", "demonic possession" and the likes. Maybe seeing someone that you never knew or never loved could help teach love but having seen, as one example, my wife with so much life, bright, intelligent, motivated; develop alcoholism, our family torn apart, a small child torn apart, .................... I just don't have words to go on. We are in a divorce but like jazzman, she is still the love of my life, but I have no control over alcohol.
I empathize with jazzman as if it could be me.
Maybe one day science will find a cure for addiction, a "miracle drug"..