Hi Blubella and welcome to SR
You will find lots of helpful information on this site.
Please read around and read the stickies up top. This will help you realize what part you have played in this and how to prevent this from happening to you again.
As the others have said, sadly, yes, he left you to do his crack. Any drug to an active addict becomes top priority even above relationships, children , responsibilities, emotions, etc. I often struggled with understanding how these similiar things (lies, stealing from me, being around his and my child high, etc.) could be done to me by my RBF while he was in active addiction. I knew him and met him as a sober, responsible and productive man and enjoyed him for quite some time that way. I was baffled that he could ever do these things to me. During this experience and his relapses, I have learned to stop worrying and focusing on the "how could hes" and turn it into how can I NOT let this happen to me again and to not let this happen to my child again.
I would say this though, despite your pain and hurt for now, consider it a blessing that he has disappeared. This makes it so much easier to detach and work on your own recovery.
I hope that you will find peace in this situation. When we are hurting, it can be hard but it also can be done.
