Originally Posted by
queenie88 
We’ve spoken on the phone twice since he’s been back. I’m trying to remain as indifferent as I can. I ask him why he calls. He says “because I just want to see how you’re doing, because I care.”
Is this all a load of bullsh*t? if he’s trying to manipulate me, what is he getting out of it from me?
He wants someone to enable his addiction. Mine tried to weasel my new location from me by saying that I could keep his stuff at my new place and he would pick it up when he found a place. I almost bit but didn't and told him he had till Oct 1st to get it out of here. After that, his stuff gets given to charity.
Originally Posted by
queenie88 I’m not groveling, I’m not begging for him to take him back, I’m no longer blaming myself for everything that happened – is it possible he’s genuinely concerned, or is something else going on? I feel like I can’t figure this one out.
These thoughts ran through my mind with my EXABF as we met today but
I soon realized that he wants back in our place for nothing more than to have a place to lay his head, call home and continue to drink and deny his addiction. To me, that's his version of love and concern - for himself, not for me.
Trouble is, I have found a new place and am taking the steps to heal and move on. He can't accept that and uses his concern for my welfare as an excuse to keep me under his thumb and off balance. After the third call tonight, I turned off the phone-I have never felt such a tiredness as I did tonight-slept through the evening almost like my mind and body shut down. It's been a tough two weeks but tomorrow, I start to pack my stuff for my move-a journey to peace and serenity.
As I sit here typing this and reading through other posts here, I realize that my new life does begin now and I refuse to let him get me off balance again. If he's stuck in neutral, that's his to deal with, not my concern.
For once, it is all about me-my happiness, my life and whatever he has to deal with, he has to go it alone.