I agree Mark, it very quickly starts to feel like a job. 'Ok, I have to drink so many in so long before I feel like today didn't happen and tomorrow wont either.' But all I feel before oblivion sets in is detached awarness, resignation and depression. For someone who doesn't like emotions I sure make myself feel a lot of bad ones. I shouldn't single myself out. I realize I'm part of a number of people who feel the same.