Yes! Everything makes me drink good days/emotions and bad days/emotions. I've managed to keep my job (I work for a great bunch of people) but I hold in all the reactions and emotions (made extreem over the years by so much self medicating I'm sure) for the end of the day then drown them. I hate expressing genuine emotions. I really hate crying. I get so excited right before I drink, everything feels so perfect in that moment.