Live-it-up
Welcome !
As to your post, to me that is one of the beautiful things about Al-Anon and the process we are all going through - it is customizable to every individual. I didn't like the "defects of character" phrase so I changed it to something that worked for me. I had trouble with "one day at a time" so I changed it to "one step at a time".
As long as the process I'm taking is a positive one, I can phrase it in any way that works for me. Words mean different things to different people. Each person will find their own way so I try to stay away from trying to make others see it as I do and am just thankful that I have the freedom to work the program my way.
Glad you're here with us -
L