Originally Posted by
Tsar7 
Ok. I got it.
It appears that no one on this thread has ever met on oldtimer that was a decent person....These oldtimers threaten murder, unemployed, angry and selfish is not a pretty picture.
Tsar
I'm on this thread and I sure hope you didn't get that impression from anything I shared - because it isn't true.
Every since I joined SR I've been sharing about my gratitude and love for the "dinosaurs" in NA. My current sponsor has 23 years. I have a sponsee with 24 years. My first sponsor will celebrate 18 years in two weeks. One of my best friends is an AA oldtimer with 24 years sober. I could keep going...but my point is that ALL OF THEM are "decent people." To the newcomer who just celebrated 6 months...I'm a oldtimer in their eyes, and I've never heard anyone describe me the way you say oldtimers are described.
On the other hand, I will not say that ALL oldtimers are decent people - nor will I say all "anytimers" are a certain way. I try not to do stereotypes, but I don't shy away from sharing my ES&H about situations with members - regardless of their clean time. And no...it's not a pretty picture when any of us act out. And although it may not be right, those of us who have some time in recovery are often held to a higher standard because we are expected to know better. We can tell the newcomer not to place us on a pedestal all day, and they'll do it anyway. So when that handful or select few of oldtimers act inappropriately, their behavior stands out in the minds of those who look to them for guidance. I refuse to let what a few people say about their experiences with oldtimers paint a picture for me...I have my own experiences to go by.
If becoming a "Yes Man" is going to make you feel better...go right ahead. But I doubt it because you wouldn't be being true to self. There's a big difference between allowing others to be wrong and cosigning wrong.