Hi Fud,
I think that the desire does lessen a lot (I'm an alcoholic, sober 3 1/2 yrs) but doesn't go away. I find that at stressful times in my life I feel vulnerable. Your long-time boyfriend has left, and even though that's positive, you feel lonely. Plus, you're unemployed. Those are two big things to deal with. Do you have any kind of support system? SR is a great place to visit and I find it keeps me thinking about the way I want to live my life. I think it's easy to become complacent, but I need to work on myself daily. Keep posting and hang around and be inspired.
Love, Anna