Kris, come on girl, you can do this. If I can do it on 30 vicodins a day for 10 years, anyone can. It's been 5 years since I touched a pill, and I will admit, it wasn't easy. But, it was able to be done. The first year was really hard for me. I wanted that stuff and I was not comfortable in my own skin. But, it was tolerable. I noticed that now that I am clean for a long time, when I get really tired or stressed I think about using. Treat yourself like your in critical care. Be gentle with yourself. Eat the right foods. Stay away from caffeine cause that will give you anxiety that you don't need right now. Drink chamomile tea, get exercise. It helps. Drink alot of water, and stay away from people, places and things. That helps too. I had to give up old friends who are still using to this day. I know you can do this. I am routing for you. I'm your number one fan. Hang in there girl. If you need someone to talk to, send me a message. I will say a prayer for you. I know how bad you want this. It's wonderful that you realize that you need the help. Don't get turned off by the other addicts and the conditions of the drug centers. That should inspire you to get clean. You don't want to wind up like those addicts. Cause if you keep using you will wind up like that eventually. Don't judge them for we are no better than them. They just can't overcome the power of their addictions. Let the way they look inspire you to move forward in recovery. My heart goes out to all the addicts that are struggling with addiction. It's truly a horror show. I have seen plenty, so I know what your talking about. I wish you a fast recovery, but remember it's a process, not a race. I'm here if you need to talk to someone who's been there, done that. Hugs, Angel