hi,
I'm new too and also happened to stumble upon this forum.
The yelling and screaming is all too familiar to me, but I've known it all my life.
Alcoholism is in my family so deep that nearly 3 years of (his) recovery won't stop my dad being a monster; drinking or no drinking, it's scary
and me being a few months in alanon doesn't stop the terror, even if I'll barely see him 'till september
anyway, YOU ARE NOT ALONE
if you can find an alanon meeting, do. I love it since I hear others share and its like they're telling my story back to me, ot explaining exactly what's going on inside my head.
It feels great and less crazy when you meet a dozen or two people who think and fear exactly the same way you do.
there's a pamphlet on detachment that's good.
Also, I'm proud of you for realizing you're afraid and want something better (happiness).
It's been six years since I knew something wasn't right 'till I did something about it and now I'm starting to feel even more of my emotions, which is scary.
I hope you keep coming back