I apologize for being such a whiner and being so aggressive. I have explored every avenue for solutions and there don't seem to be any, that's all. No, I won't leave SR, then I'd have nowhere to go at all. It is tempting to drink over all this but I won't. That would just make it worse, and I don't need things to be any worse.
I am trying to LIVE in sobriety but feel like I'm just existing. I apologize again for being a pain in the @ss.
And I must disagree: Paul is not 'wrong', he's just got a different opinion, a different way of seeing it. It's not 'wrong' just different.