Originally Posted by
josie25 
I still love him absolutely and am prepared to accept things as they are, as long as I can step away when he is doing this...
It sounds to me that you don't have much for standards. Accepting the binges for the sake of the brief periods of abstinence he has suggests that you don't feel you deserve any better. I'm sad to think that, but I also understand that.
My bar of standards was so low when I was with my EXAH that no one could limbo under it. I clung to the fantasy that some day surely he would change, and he was just a poor fellow who got a lot of bad breaks in his life (and he'd be glad to tell you that too).
Fortunately mine moved on to a new victim after I left him, but because I refused to work on the real problem-me-I simply repeated the same thing only with different men for 13 more years.
I'm grateful I don't have to live that way anymore, and I know I deserve a partner who is loving, respectful, and honest. Addicts/alcoholics need not apply.
