There are a set of Martha Beck questions that I often repeat in my head:
What exactly am I feeling? What hurts? (I feel ugly; I feel used)
What is the painful story I am telling myself? (I am unattractive, others will come along and take him/her from me because I'm not enough; I'm being made laughing stock in the meantime, etc etc)
Can I be 100% sure my painful story is true? (No...I'm just exhausted and sad and this is where my mind goes)
Is there a different story that might work better? (Like, we are both just focused on other things right now and it's affecting how we interact with each other; there are other things that I can do to feel strong & healthy; etc.)
I've worked through that with my counselor and with my journal, and it's really helped me to power through some of the worst days.
Fsquared, you're doing much better than when you first arrived here -- I don't know if you're too close to things to see that, but you ARE making progress.
Hang in there and keep working on you
