You're right. What you're doing isn't working, which only means you give up, or you do ANYTHING else you can think of or that is suggested to you to get and stay sober. When you want it.. and I hope that's soon for you. This misery is self induced, but the other side of it can be yours for the taking as well. I couldn't quit until I was done.. done for good. I hope you reach that point soon.. this is deadly stuff. But I know you know that already.