I'll put it on my mile long 'to read' list Daisy. I own about two hundred books right now that I've yet to read, and I keep buying more, like a hungry hungry, ... let's say.... Hippo.
I've always been an information addict. The internet was the worst thing that ever happened to me. Still though, I prefer books, paper, musty from use, notations in the margins from college kids of the ninteen fifties, twenties, seventies, inscriptions on the first pages gifting books to long forgotten loves, there's nothing like a book gone through a life of its own. In seattle, twice a year, they would have a vast library sell off, tens of thousands of books in this big warehouse by the old naval base. Cheap cheap cheap. I would walk out with as many as two big bags could carry, before I had to lug them on the bus, when I had a car, even more. It's always been a peculiar problem of mine when I move, as I often do. When I moved to New York I sent all of the books I couldn't part with to my mothers house in Maine. I got rid of another two thirds, but there were still a few hundred at least. It took me FOREVER to get her to send them to Minneapolis when I moved here. She kept saying 'you're just going to move again siamcat, why don't you just keep them here until you 'settle down', lol, as if she somehow still thinks me the type to 'settle down'. Well, given recent events maybe she was right, my heart has always been in the west, I like it here but I always felt like Seattle was my home, and now that notion is pounded home in a way I never dreamed possible. So, this time, I'm really going to wait until I'm in a non sentimental mood, go through them all and IMMEDIATLY discard them, sell them, donate them, just get them out of my site before the inevitable 'second round' where I go through and convince myself I really should keep 'Defend the Shenandoah' for reference in case I ever read that Stonewall Jackson biography. Or that I really need three different biographies of Hilter, four of Napoleon, six of Augustus, five accounts of the Russian Revolution, and a 'History' of Atlantis written by some crackpot pre Cayce. Oh well...
Transformation. Acceptance. Love. Rushed over me from a greater purpose. Found. Stimulation. Mental. Physical. Spiritual. There is no differentiation anymore. The eastern definition of god, a flowing, a recognition, everything is light, everything is love, a rock, a bug, the clouds, a thought, everything flowing into each other and back out again, and now, realizing this instantaneous, through a miracle of 'chance', I become again part of this beauty, part of something eternal, no longer a cog in the wheel imagined, no longer rotting, stinking, seething with failure. I am whole, complete, amalgamated again. Through thousands of lifetimes I've found again. I've found and been found and am founding, becoming, with...