Thread: My Boyfriend.
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Old 06-30-2009, 03:34 PM
  # 12 (permalink)  
123bubblegum123
it's a movie, you're the star
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 355
Concernedgf,

All of the responses you got are really amazing and helpful. I, myself, am an addict and have also dated my fair share of them and it's tough work - I honestly couldn't imagine dating one if I was a "normie!"

Your boyfriend's DOC is the same of mine and I cannot tell you how difficult it is to get off of them! Not only do you get physically sick when you quit, but you get mentally different - depressed, anxious, overall uncomfortable and negative. I ended up getting clean "alone" - I made a lot of great friends in my first stab and worked on old friendships and relationships, but I was still going at this whole sobriety deal alone while starting as a Freshman at college - no easy task really. You sound very loving but honestly, all your "support" is enabling him. He's taking your money and wasting your time.

When in a relationship with an addict, or any man really, you must ask yourself the following questions:

* what am I getting out of this relationship?
* what does my boyfriend/girlfriend do to help me?
* am I always feel tired/drained/used by my boyfriend/girlfriend?

Addicts often share the following personality traits: selfish, overly sensitive, moody, manipulative, and one-track-minded. Now, of course many addicts are lovely people without the influence of substances, but substances usually form these characteristics and inprint themselves on the addict. I'm sure you're boyfriend is a nice guy, and it's obvious you care a great deal about him, but you are young and honestly deserve someone who gets your needs met too.

I hope I helped and please feel free to private message me and talk some time!

hugs & support,
Rachel

p.s. I'm 19 too =]
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