I see we've got a couple new members that posted here, welcome to SR, I hope this thread inspired you in some way.
Laura, I'd go through and thank everyone for their posts, but I'm on vacation and using a laptop so I just want to say that I found everyone's posts helpful and supportive. That's humbling and inspirational in my recovery.
So many people have false starts, you don't need to be sorry, we'll keep a seat warm and we don't shoot our wounded. Keep coming and reaching out for help, we can't escape the grace of our brothers and sisters in recovery forever, if you want this bad enough the miracle will happen.