Thanks to everyone who has posted. You are a group of supportive and amazing people.
I didn't write this thread in the best state of mind last night. When my husband asked me for the beer, I took it as a sign that he was fine with me drinking... and so figured, no big deal since I had been thinking about it all day anyway, so I gave in. Unless I'm stressed, I have no problem thinking about alcohol until about 5 PM and then I can't stop thinking about it. Yesterday I kept telling myself I wouldn't have any and so I thought about it all day. It is as though before, it was enough just to know the evening drinks were in store...and as much as I wanted.
Best wishes for continued success to all and thanks for the encouragement.