I'm pushing on for now even though there's a part of me that doesn't want to. Can I get some ESH on how people keep at it even when it feels like you don't need to?
Benham, I'm glad things are still going forward in a healthy way.
That part of you that doesn't want to push on......what is it suggesting you do instead?
I tend to listen to ALL the voices inside me, give them all an audience, and let them say their piece. What does it say?
As for keeping at it......working on myself had to become a lifelong commitment in order to get past the dry patches. The alternative is just to play it by the seat of my pants and react to crises....when the crises hurt too much, and scarred me too much, then I had to make a plan for daily maintenance. Suffering has a way of shaking us out of our complacency, doesn't it?
I have, at various times in my situations: Seen a counselor to work on ME, not THEM. Worked with a coach to align my life and make it more happy. Attended al-anon meetings. Written regularly in a journal. Learned to meditate, so I never forgot how I was feeling (so hard, though!). And so on.
When I finally felt what happiness was supposed to feel like, then I wasn't complacent any more. I would defend this feeling with my life now -- it is the opposite of complacent.
So....to answer your question: You DON'T need to. You could just react-and-suffer instead. But I'll tell you first hand, this way is much easier
What kind of ongoing program do you have to help keep yourself sane, healthy, and focused on YOUR future (regardless of what choices she makes)?