Congratulations may sound like an empty word right now Jay.
But I'll say it anyway. The reaction of your friend and your wife smells a lot like enabling behavior to me. Looks like you're aware of that though.
Jay, the first night is the hardest, and you've made it to the other side. I'm sorry you couldn't get in here last night.
You have to know by now that many folk were thinking about you.
Good luck with the doctor. Be straight and up front and honest. No matter the outcome, you will gain something.
Keep posting my friend.
And as Roy suggests, you are the strong one here...