Puddy

You knew someone had to come in and throw a wrench in this post dintya?

My turn...sobriety has not been a gift to me. A gift implies something for nothing. I tried to just accept the initial sobriety I had back in 2001-2002 without working for it. I lost it.

I've had to earn sobriety...it is not a gift to me...I have to work for it through action and earn it. Then I have to work my butt off just to keep it...not so much a gift, rather an opportunity to save my life but only if I'm willing to go to any length.

I believe, for me, the gift I have been given is twofold: the gift of desperation and the gift of willingness. The first gift was a result of my self will and my thinking. The second gift was a gift from God. After all, I never generated any willingness to do the right thing for myself and others for 41 years beforehand. Must have been from God. I must have been called upon because I would have never sought this out.

This program ain't for those who need it, neither is it a program for those who want it...it is only for those who are willing to go to any length, and then actually go to any length.

Sorry to throw a wrench in this but I'd rather not be given any more gifts - I always misuse, neglect, and abuse gifts. My gifts get broken, and this goes all the way back to childhood with toys that would break through my actions.

You guys are all a gift to me though I do know that for sure! I promise to try not to abuse, misuse, or neglect you! Please let me know if I am so I can make it right whenever it may occur.

Dave