Your post made me weep at 7am over my first cup of coffee.
You were my first real love except that you came from Texas - so the pick up truck didn't smell of fish, otherwise the details were pretty much the same.
My perspective is that the "we" who you wrote that beautiful letter to, who you make amends to because their own As can't, well we don't hate any of you. (At least I don't)
To me the reason we are so sad, angry, confused is because we had a glimpse of the person you have become in our own As and we didn't hate that person, we loved them - truly, madly, deeply .... emphasis on the "madly" part.
I'm so happy for you and the people in your life that you work the steps and they work for you ....
I believe it works if you work it .... for us too.
Edited to add: I worked in the publishing industry years and you are a very good writer. I think there is a good book in you somewhere if you feel like giving it a whirl.