Welcome to SR DeVon! Glad you made it!
I feel your pain. Watching someone who is so obviously sick consciously choose to stay sick is heartbreaking. Unfortuantely, your mom is the only one who can make the choice to get better. As hard as it is to accept, you don't have the power to fix her.
The good news is you can take steps to fix yourself. And realizing you've been in denial about your mom's addictions is a very big step! Many children of alcoholics and addicts never get that far. So hey, you've got something to be grateful for today.