Hi stressed. I don't think it ever ends, I think it changes and we somehow make peace with things and make decisions. I don't know about recovery rates (I know they're not great), but I do know my A has the tools for recovery if he so chooses. And that's what it's all about -- he has to make his choices and I have to make mine. This has been the toughest thing in the world for me but also the most liberating. I feel better now than I have in a very long time and it's not because my husband has made some miraculous turnaround. I'm becoming more comfortable with me and getting better at being nice to me. You get to be important again, because you can put yourself in first place!