Hopeless to me is being dead. As long as there is the slightest flicker of hope all is not gone yet. Your disease is talking to you right now, I'm sure you've heard Cunning, baffling, powerful. Well that's exactly what is going on right now. Stay true to yourself, you can do this, you are not hopeless. Read step 1 2 & 3. Keep posting, keep going to your meetings, keep talking to your sponsor. Honey, this too shall pass. Day 6 in itself is a miracle, isn't it? I know it was for me. I couldn't believe that I could go 1 hr without drinking/drugging. I know you can do this. Tell your disease to go take a damn hike because you're not quitting!!!!!! Keep up the good work FS you can do this.