new
hi, i am a 29 year old female who's new. i have been struggling with my drinking problem for most of my adult life. it's cost me so many things. i lost a job because i got drunk on a flight for a business trip and was turned away from an airport. i got in a dui accident and was on probation for four years, which is the only thing on my record now. my last boyfriend dumped me because i couldn't seem to stop drinking and acting irrational. he came over once and i was passed out on the floor by myself and dumped me. i have started getting in trouble at my new job for being late and missing days all the time because i'd go on days long benders. i think i may have alienated a close friend of mine who had been interested in me romantically because i got drunk and sent him some texts that made no sense and i think he thinks i'm crazy now. ive lost relationships, jobs, friends. my best friend is keeping his distance now, due to my drinking. my brother is an alcoholic too, and he just recently got in a dui wreck and lost his car. i am sick of booze ruining my life and his life. he wont get help but i looked up the times for meetings in my new city. i even went on antabuse for a while to stop, but its not working and i want to stop before drinking ruins my life forever. i know this is kind of long, but i just wanted to say hello and i needed to talk to some people who have the same problem with drinking that i do. i cant talk to people i know in person about it, im far too ashamed. anyway, hello everyone.