Ripley

Hi,

I'm new here and on Day 27 of sobriety. So far just white-knuckling it and taking Antabuse to deter me from drinking, but I'm starting to crave the booze more rather than less as time goes by and realized additional support was needed if I'm going to make it. I've tried AA in the past, and had mixed results. I'm going to give another meeting a try tonight though.

I'm not really good with people so I don't have a lot of real time support. I was a closet drinker so even those who are close to me don't realize I have stopped because they never knew I was drinking as much as I did (hence the reason I spent most of my time alone and the reason I am now coming to the unsettling realization that I literally have no life outside the booze.)

I'm 35 and have been in and out of rehabs and AA since I was 16. I'm currently in graduate school though on summer break, and for the past 20 years my life has pretty much consisted of drinking, writing fiction and reading. That's it. Being sober, I now have a ton more time but no idea how to use it and am definitely not liking the loneliness.