He has many many options about where he heads from where he is now. Some require no effort ( just wait for you to fall for the ****) , some things a little more effort ( find someone else to provide the cushions), and so on and so so until way along the line he gets to SOME effort and he starts addressing his stuff.......way along that line he may start giving effort to someone else...........
Don't be the option that requires NO effort. Don't let yrslf. Do hug yourself for having the humanity to care. Then give the energy of that caring to yourself and your children.
It hurts and it is hard to watch anothers suffering, but we have to listen to those who know what they are talking about on this dreadful disease.
sending you love and support to keep going